Wednesday, May 9, 2007

A long day... longer night.

It started at 10am. I had a Dr. appt, Lyme related, for an alternative treatment option. While in that appt with my PCP (Dawn) I asked her about little pin point dots that had appeared all over K-girl's face. They seemed insignificant but I thought I'd mention them to Dawn and have her ease my mind and save me the phone call to K-girl's already overly contacted pediatric Dr.

Dawn looked at the red dots on K-girl, checked her body for bruising and sent us to the PCP for immediate labs. Her pediatrician wasn't there so we saw another physician from the office. Dr. Clair was wonderful with us and seconded the need for the labs. Thankfully however, Dr. Kovatch (Brenden's Dr.) heard us in the hallway (we are quite a loud clan) and came to find out why we were there. I told him they wanted labs on K-girl... he asked why. I told him about the dots- he said, "Petechiae?" He then began to ask questions to get to the why of those dots... Was she crying today? No. Was she coughing? No. Was she vomiting? No. Is she on meds? Yes, amoxicilian. His response- that wouldn't do it. Oohhh.. he said, they want the labs to rule out Leukemia???

And sadly, I had to say yes.

Before you think I sound strong/whatever... I cried my little eyes out from the first Dr. to the pediatrician. Paul wasn't answering so I called my best friend and just lost it. Thankfully she didn't. She is the voice of reason in times like these and yet has more empathy and compassion than anyone I've ever met. She lets me wallow momentarily then pulls me up when I can't get up myself and sets me on a straight path. (Thank you Stacy.) I called my mother in law, who immediately phoned her church and some other family members to have us on prayer lists... and I called Debbie, my church mentor, to ask her to pray as well. WITHOUT these- I would still be a basket case.

The labs were horrendous. K-girl was ordered to have one vial of blood for the CBC- platelets etc (rule out Leukemia test) and her nutritionist previously ordered 8 vials of blood for alternate treatment options for Lyme. I was trying to have them all done at the same time except the lab tech couldn't get half a vial from her arm let alone 9 full vials. The tech kept adjusting the needle, pulling it out, reinserting it to her vein, and jiggling the thing. K-girl was WAILING. Really. I just sat there trying to comfort her but what could I say. The boys got upset for her... tears down B-boy's face as if he was the one in the chair. I sat there saying to God,

"PLEASE- if her giving blood is this hard, how will she, or I, ever make it through something like Leukemia?"

We ended up having to have her finger stuck to finish filling the half filled vial of blood. They told us the labs would be back in about 4 hours. That was 5.5 hours ago.

Today took HOURS as all our doctors are at least an hour away from our house. And the lab is 1.5 hours away. It was so hectic today and my mind was so consumed by this labwork that when the test was done after 4... my son quietly said, "Mom, we're a little hungry." It was the first moment I was able to stop and be still as there was nothing more I could do but wait... and I realized in that moment that my children hadn't eaten in 7 hours.

My children may have been a little rowdy since they were cooped up in offices or the van all day BUT never once did they complain that I DIDN'T FEED THEM. What in the world?

I took them for a meal and then headed home... to wait. And wait. And wait.

On the way home I talked to a dear friend who stopped me mid sentence to pray for me, for K-girl and for our family. I have to tell you, there aren't many who will do that. I know many are indeed in prayer for us even while I write this... but not many will actually stop you to pray right then and there. I love that about my friends. They are those people. And I am grateful.

The doctor will call soon. (He'll have to as I can't get a moment's rest without his call) He will call to say that my daughter DOES NOT have Leukemia. NOT that she couldn't or she is above it... BUT BECAUSE GOD KNOWS... I CAN'T HANDLE IT. He says in His word that He won't give us more than we can handle... and I know for sure... my breaking point was K-girl's positive Lyme test. This test will NOT come back positive. And for that... I too am grateful.

1 comment:

Carolyn said...

Oh Chelle - I am praying fervently. Please update when you have time so we know how to pray further. Believing in God's grace,